We recently went on a trip with our boys, its was great to spend quality time as a family and enjoy the time without distraction. I love the conversations I hear them having with each other and I love the topics that come up whilst I'm present in the moment. Some hilarious and extremely inappropriate but also some very relevant and curious.
I struggle as a Mum when we go on vacation, I try and think of every situation that could arise that I may need to come up with a solution to e.g. Flies, bugs, heat, other people, noise the list goes on all to try to alleviate any long winded melt downs or constant dysregulation. Over the years of vacations we have had some situations arise that I'm sure all families endure but I also know that there are things we have gone through that are pretty typical for a family with an ASD child and most of those situations were due to other people and their lack of understanding or awareness.
I watched my little boy try so hard to make friends in the caravan park we were staying at, I watched him try and interact with every child on the jumping pillow. In some cases the kids engaged for a little while but then just seemed to tolerate him but in others cases they were just rude. Over the duration of the week the kids just started to warm to his fun personality and as we walked around the park kids would yell out "Hi Orlando" from their camp sites as we walked by. One night at the playground Orlando had a crowd as he acted out a scary story and performed his favorite song Believer by Imagine dragons. The next day as kids hung around our camp site one boy (who had been rude to him earlier in the week) said "RESPECT BRA Orlando is amazing I couldn't get up and sing and act in front of strangers that way and he is really good." I had to remind myself that Orlando is a 9 year old boy yes he may be autistic but that he is so much more than that.
I sat back and watched a lot of his interactions and we worked through some situations together talking about appropriate personal space and appropriate topics of conversations. I called him over to me on the side line of the park and would give him strategies on how to deal with somethings and he would go back to the park and then tell everyone what we had discussed e.g. "Mum thinks you might be having weird thoughts about me." (LOL insert me smacking myself in the forehead) even though Orlando wanted to go home after day 2 of camping I know he had a great time and the social interactions are amazing opportunities for him to practice his social skills.
Whilst sitting at the pool one day at the caravan park I noticed a family struggling with their daughter, she was targeting her brother and hitting him as he swam around trying to get away. This went on for a while as the parents walked around asking her to get out and sit with them, at one stage Dad having to pull her out screaming as she tried to get away. It was a 38 degree day and there were a lot of people in the small pool just starring at what was happening. A discussion started in the group beside me as I sat on the grass. They talked about how the girl had been hitting her mother the day before and they couldn't believe her behavior or how the parents were dealing with it. I of course had to put my 2 cents in and explained that the girl may have challenges and the parents appeared to be trying their best in what would be a difficult situation. I cant tell you how it felt to watch that family struggle as everyone watched them but I can say I have respect for them as parents trying their best in a tough situation.
Knowing the challenges that our family may face going on holidays has had us persist and come up with strategies that help our boys and ourselves to enjoy our time away. It would have been easy in the early days to just say it was to hard and stay home but we have had some amazing adventures and cant wait to go on our next one.
Thanks for reading
Jess xx
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